The Bored Soothsayer

… talks about Stanley (2)

Let me tell you about my other friend aside from Sandi and Jereene.

Today, let’s talk about the person whose status messages and other “greatness” (take note of such euphemism) in yahoo messenger and facebook have caught my attention while I was in my busiest today:  STANLEY.

All right. Why again am I writing about him? He is a jerk. He is undeniably smart witty.

STAN and his fetish on sex videos

Well, recently there was this sex video of Katrina Halili and Hayden Cam Kho that spread over the Internet. And boy was he in such delight. He watched all most? some of the videos. What an addict! And just like everybody else (except me hahaha), he was singing “Careless Whisper” unceasingly while playing ppppoker face.

STAN and his thoughts on AIDS

In his current YM status message he shared an irony: “90 people get the Swine Flu and everybody wants to wear a mask… A million people have AIDS and no one wants to wear a condom. ”

Nothing to add… puzzled by no one wanting to wear a condom. I was thinking why would women wear one? But then again, I figured if I said that everyone would think I’m bo-bo (say this with an accent, por favor) Oops! I suddenly remembered the Vagina monologues and all the different kinds of moaning. How would a vagina moan if it were wearing a condom? HA-HA-HA!

STAN and the Prediction of the Bored Soothsayer

Based on his thoughts and current fetish, I warn those people who will be acquainted with such (laughs at Senator Bong Revilla’s comment: “Pervert of the highest kind” HAHAHAHAHA)… with such… yeah. He is a dangerous thinker.  So to all his girlfriends, and soon-to-be “preys”: (Laughs) Just make sure that Stanley is … himself. Moreover, be smart.  (Of course, why would you date someone who’s dumb, Stan? That is if you ever go on dates. Hahaha) Also, never make him join a singing competition, or else take your last breath with his version of “Careless Whisper” (Aren’t these “napkin” brands? Just assuming.) Basketball is alright, though this connotes something… else. And then please… just bear with him, and be 10x smarter than he is.

… sorry Stan, I just had to do it. I had no choice. (Laughs.)

Second Entry: Stanley — $5 if you want me to delete this. I accept gifts. J

Finally, Peace. I’m bored and I promised that I’d write about your greatness. But then, this is all a joke.

BUT DEFINE JOKE.

P.S. This is for your guilty pleasure!

Time can never mend the careless whispers of a good friend
To the heart and mind, ignorance is kind
there’s no comfort in the truth
pain is all you’ll find

Should’ve known better

I feel so unsure
as I take your hand and lead you to the dance floor
as the music dies, something in your eyes
calls to mind the silver screen
and all its sad good-byes

I’m never gonna dance again
guilty feet have got no rhythm
though it’s easy to pretend
I know you’re not a fool

Should’ve known better than to cheat a friend
and waste the chance that I’ve been given
so I’m never gonna dance again
the way I danced with you

Time can never mend
the careless whispers of a good friend
to the heart and mind
ignorance is kind
there’s no comfort in the truth
pain is all you’ll find

I’m never gonna dance again
guilty feet have got no rhythm
though it’s easy to pretend
I know you’re not a fool

Should’ve known better than to cheat a friend
and waste this chance that I’ve been given
so I’m never gonna dance again
the way I danced with you

Never without your love

Tonight the music seems so loud
I wish that we could lose this crowd
Maybe it’s better this way
We’d hurt each other with the things we’d want to say

We could have been so good together
We could have lived this dance forever
But noone’s gonna dance with me
Please stay

And I’m never gonna dance again
guilty feet have got no rhythm
though it’s easy to pretend
I know you’re not a fool

Should’ve known better than to cheat a friend
and waste the chance that I’ve been given
so I’m never gonna dance again
the way I danced with you

(Now that you’re gone) Now that you’re gone
(Now that you’re gone) What I did’s so wrong
that you had to leave me alone